Aspiring Human Being.
They told me to create a new normal.
And after all this time I can only say that I know myself even less;
but that's okay.
I like the mystery.
all i think about is clothes i can’t afford and food i want to order.
Joachim Tielke, Kit violin (pochette), 1679. Hamburg. Via MKG Hamburg.
This pocket fiddle, ornamented with tortoiseshell marquetry in ivory and decorated with rhinestones, exhibits the typical features of the richly embellished Baroque instruments from the Hamburg workshop of the instrument-maker Tielke.
hi im a woman living in a post apocalyptic environment/desert island on a tv show and i have the smoothest armpits u have ever seen
hi im a woman in medieval times and my eyebrows r perfect and I have no leg hair
hello im a viking woman in a movie and i have a thin and trim waist and a huge rack and perfect eyeliner
Hi I’m a woman in a world without power and I wake up with perfect curled hair
“We’re so bad at sex and then we wonder why women aren’t like, really aggressive about sex. We think it’s cause they don’t have as much desire as we do. That’s how stupid men are, that we think ‘they’re just weird, women are like fucked up in the head cause they don’t wanna just fuck all the time. If I was a women, I’d just fuck everybody. Why don’t they wanna fuck all the time? I do’. Of course you do, cause when you fuck, you get to fuck a woman! When she fucks, she has to fuck a guy! Wildly different experiences. For a man, 100% of the time, it’s the greatest thing that ever happened in his entire life. For a woman, about 40% of the time, when she’s being fucked by a guy, she’s thinking ‘I’ll get over this in a week. It’s not the worst thing. I’m not gonna cry this time’
“Another thing that proves how bad men are at sex is that after sex, you’re looking at two very different people. The man just wants to lay there, be cool and the woman wants to cuddle…’Why is she so NEEDY?’ She’s not needy you idiot, she’s horny, because you did nothing for her. YOU DID ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. HER PUSSY IS ON FIRE BECAUSE IT’S GONE UNFUCKED COMPLETELY. Of course you’re fine, you climbed on and went “KFHGSKG” and rolled off. And she’s on you because she’s like ‘WH-at SOMETHING ELSE HAS TO HAPPEN, THIS IS BULLSHIT!!” If you fuck a woman well, she will LEAVE YOU ALONE. ‘Thanks a lot buddy, zzzzz’”
Oh, Louis CK, advocate for the female orgasm. (via wantonmasochist)
Nothing has ever been more accurate.
This is the most important thing on Tumblr. LCK you are a lyrical genius.-Sugar Mama